This article was recently submitted by an anonymous reader.
This logo just oozes glorious mediocrity.
Going to a movie is an experience. You are paying to escape the reality that is your life. At Carmike Cinema in Aberdeen, however, you are paying for things like poor service, cell phone interruptions, bad film quality, and lastly poor service. I know I said poor service twice, it’s supposed to be funny, right?
Anything that distracts your movie experience rests on the shoulders of the, “less than caring” staff. I call them “Grumpies” because they never seem to have smiles on their faces. Or maybe they are zombies. They seem so lifeless!
So first off, why the cell phones ladies and gents!? Nothing makes my eyes dart away from the screen faster than a tiny illuminated screen, followed by “tappity-tappity.” And to actually talk on the phone during a movie…well those people are obviously going straight to hell. But hey, if I actually saw a theater person coming in and checking the theaters, maybe they would mention to put away the cell phone, or in my world, take the phone, break it in half, and politely hand it back to them and say “Enjoy the movie!” with a big grin.
This man is watching you have a tinkle. Splendid!
Oh-oh! You have to use the bathroom. You better go quick before the movie starts. You also better enjoy having people stare at you if you are a guy because there are NO WALLS up between the urinals. If you are a lady, then you might as wear a bio-suit to protect from contamination.
But hey, they have digital projection…whoop-dee doo! Doesn’t mean anything if they aren’t being used correctly. Every other theater I have been to, even the cheap theaters that get old movies, the film has at least filled the screen from left to right, and in most cases, top to bottom. Like this.
This is what you should see.
But our theater has trailers and movies playing like this.
This is probably what you actually see.
Am I taking crazy pills? Am I the only one that notices this? Hope you brought your reading glasses! Why have a screen this big if you are only going to use 60% of it? I should tell the manager!
Oh wait, there’s never one there, or at least when I’ve wanted to talk to one. No, instead I get a lacky that just tells me the projectors have always been that way. “Fantastic, that makes it all better now! May I borrow your binoculars?”
I fear my community has grown accustomed to blinking cell phones, constant talking, poor service, and terrible presentation. I fear customer service is about serving yourself as the employee before the customer. It saddens me that I have no other option. Sure, the Capitol gets films now and again, but it’s hardly competition with it’s lack of general appeal and its unfinished lobby. I also like being able to enjoy my pop and popcorn while I watch the movie, so sorry Capitol, I’m not impressed. (…but I could be, I’m rooting for you.)
(Editor’s note: the Capitol Theatre lobby renovation is now in progress, and will hopefully be done before the summer musical, so that’s a plus. Unfortunately they don’t seem keen on changing the popcorn/pop policy any time soon.)
If you are someone who hates our theater’s quality as much as I do, you can leave feedback by going to the Carmike website which will probably do absolutely nothing. Or, you can raise a stink the next time you are there and have to deal with this garbage. The more people that do it, the better the chance of something changing. Power in numbers folks!
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Based on an unscientific sampling of comments from people on the street, I’m going to go out on a limb and predict that 
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The Snooze has learned a few facts which shed additional light on the pothole situation at Office Max.
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How to make a statement downtown
Saturday, August 22, 2009A reader sent in the following piece that I assume (and hope) is meant as satire. Photos were added by Groucho. Enjoy!
Submitted By Tom Black
Doesn't Joan look faaaabulous?
When is a facelift a face lift? Joan Rivers, Burt Reynolds and Kenny Rogers have shown us how to inject new life into an old body and get noticed for the effort. What is the point of spending so much money on a facelift if nobody notices the work?
Some local developers don’t understand how to reap the benefits of a good investment. Some of our local developers are spending their money on facelifts that are going unnoticed.
This is becoming an alarming trend in the architectural scene in our city. The building owned by Troy and Suzette McQuillen recently under went an extensive facelift, only you can’t tell. All of the new work revealed an old building, albeit with the new addition of a self indulgent block of glory but none the less the building still looks old. Is that the best they can do?
The community has been watching intently since the aging wooden facade was removed from the former home of the original Boston Fern a couple years ago, revealing a less than attractive block wall.
In an interesting public relations move, the McQuillen’s seemingly taunted the community with a promising stack of bricks behind their building for the last few years. Their additions of glossy signs alerted patrons to the operating business while confusing architectural students through out the region. This move was evidently an attempt to prove that you can put silver buckles on an old mule.
Meanwhile the building’s war torn chic look became an icon for the “whoops, what was I thinking (WWWIT)” downtown remodeling movement. A movement that has been followed by the owners of the Pauer Sound and Music, Natural Abundance, Chamber of Commerce and Dakota Pawn buildings. Even the super secret mystery building, with shades forever drawn tight, got into the act.
If they put the history museum in a more modern building, I bet more people would come.
Following the lead of the Dacotah Prairie Museum, these developers have pushed through the dirge of remodeling and have appeared on the other side with new cloth awnings, fresh paint and fewer pigeon hostels. Only to have a building that looks old, again.
Meanwhile, others are still reeling from the trauma of full discovery (a natural byproduct of the WWWIT School of remodeling). These poor developers are seemingly frozen from the shock, because behind their aging façade was an old building. I do wish the best of luck to the Chamber, Natural Abundance and the pawn shop as they work through their options. I sincerely hope they emerge from this state of unrest with a pleasing façade.
But please, do this town a favor and don’t make your building look old. Obviously it is a heaping waste of money because now for years people will drive down our Main Street and see a bunch of nice old buildings and think, “huh, nobody seems to be investing in this town”.
I encourage you to buck this trend of New Old and go for something more newer. You could try to make your old building look new by using some other materials like vinyl siding, ton’s of people put it on their houses. Or maybe, shiny metal which has been the choice of Quonset builders and jewelers for decades. Be creative. Think outside the box.
Just because an architect would never do it doesn’t mean it can’t be done. And for Pete’s sake you don’t want your new money going to make your old building look old again.
That would be like Jennifer Aniston getting surgery to add wrinkles or Hugh Jackman gaining weight on purpose or Pamela Anderson getting a breast reduction. That would be insane.
Buck the trend. Make a statement with your facelift! It is working for Joan.